Jr High Camp

So I was asked this Sunday if I would like to go to the Jr high Camp and be a counselor. The first thing that came to mind was could I get the time off work. Jeff is all for me going and would mind taking care of Breann for the week. I know this would be a great opportunity for me the only thing holding me back is funding. Unfortunately I have planned all my vacation time that I get for the year and Jeff and I really need the hours I work to pay bills. I guess I am writing this to get advice from people on how they would handle the situation. The trip is in 2 weeks and I am trying to rearrange my schedule so I can go. Please write to me and let me know what you think.

Anxiety

So we had a great day this past Sunday. Breann was dedicated at the church, we had a nice brunch at East Side Mario's and Jeff and I had a great softball game. I only had one problem through out the day. Now ever since I went back to work I have been dealing with anxiety issues. It wasn't until very recently I had my anxiety under control. In fact I had to stress myself to the point of having a migraine in order to relax and finally feel relieved from the anxiety that was lingering. Anyways . . . on Sunday while at East Side Mario's I was distracted trying to move a sharp knife out of Breann's reach when her foot skipped off the chair I had her standing on. Now she did tumble to the ground and luckily landed on her bottom yet she started crying. All of a sudden I felt like I was in a dream where I was trying to get to her but no matter what I did I couldn't reach her. I wasn't going to loose focus on her that was for sure but I couldn't get to her. Then I had the room close in on me, the people in that room were getting louder and I really couldn't breath. The anxiety attack was going to hit me at full force. By the time I got Breann my sister already picked her up. She was still crying and and the room wasn't calming down for me. So I basically ran out of the room, I think I knocked into about two people on my way out of the restaurant. Once outside I was much better and I know it only took me a few seconds to regain composure. Breann was still upset but at least I could truly focus on her and not be tunnel vision. I know we all try to get through the tough times in our lives and I know I have been through tougher moments then that but I think when those moments catch you off guard that is when it is the most difficult to deal with. If you are wondering why I am mentioning this to you, I really don't know. There is no reason behind this other then to let you all in on not so graceful moment in my life.

She is walking

OK . . . so Breann has been walking for about 2 weeks now. She still prefers support and if you give her a chance she will crawl. She sit in a forward facing car seat and I love her expressions as she looks around and sees the world from a different angle. We have a set bed time for her and she goes to bed pretty easily. She loves to listen to songs and claps with Twinkle Little Star, and Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes. Her baby dedication will be this Sunday, June 7Th at Parkcrest during the 10am service in Live.

GRRR!!

So I have been trying to put up pictures of Breann from Easter and her birthday with no luck. Hopefully soon though. In the mean an up-date to my fans. Breann turned one and it seems that she advanced her communication skills and almost walking skills. I know that it is normal for a little one to grow like that but I guess I thought it would happen a little slower. Anyways . . .she is still teething away and tring to read to me.

Jeff is done with school for the summer and is truly enjoying the moments with Wii games. We are getting ready for our good friends wedding by throwing parties and making sure all our stuff for their big day is ready. I am trying to get things in order to go back to school in September, I think the biggest thing right now is getting my schedule in order so I can do school work, go to work and give the attention to my family that they deserve. For those of you who haven't heard I am going back to school and getting my degree in Christian Ministry. I am meeting up with the student ministries pastor at Canyon Hills Friends Church on Friday which should be very interesting.

So hopefully my computer won't be a pain anymore and I will get all the photos I want up on the website. Until then, Smile!!

First Year Reflections

OK . . . Yes Breann is turning a year old in a few weeks and I have been thinking back to this past year that went by way to fast. This time last year I was having sleepless nights due to a little one wanting to play kick ball in mommy's tummy. Then came the special day with more sleepless nights of me making sure she is fed and that she is breathing. Followed by milestone moments of her turning over, sitting up, crawling, smiling, saying mama and dada blowing kisses and much more. Remembering when her little infant cry turned into a baby cry. Then going from breast milk to baby food and now finger foods. Of course having to go to work and leave her at home with daddy is hard for any parent. Also the worries of what is in store for her in the later years. Jeff says not to worry about it she is not a teenager yet. Taking her for her walks and having her take naps with me. So much and yet the year went by way to fast.

Alumni Concert

Last night was the Mariners and Show Time (Show Choir) alumni concert. It was awesome to see so may old friends sing there hearts out, or even play the instruments like no one was watching. It brought back so many fun memories. I had the pleasure of hosting the show with Amy and singing with my best friend Sara and sister Kelli. I have to say the part that brought me back was when the alumni Jazz Band took stage, Ms. Ryder lead them in a series of favorites and finished with In The Mood. But I couldn't help but flash back to my freshman year (the last year the Jazz Band did the song) and remembering why they always received the standing ovation. All the alumni for all three groups proved that the music department at Mayfair is a powerful and life impacting experience. Hopefully I will have a clip of This Little Light of Mine up shortly.

I have been doing some searching about myself and talking with people about certain things. Now I haven't answered all my questions I needed to yet and I am really trying to be patient with everything. One thing I have done was take a strength finders test and was surprise to see what it said about my strengths. Yet once I read about the strengths I couldn't help but think, Oh my that is totally true. now I will reveal more when the time comes and I thank those who have been generous to listen and give me advice that I really needed.

In the mean time Jeff and i are trying to prepare for Breann's first birthday. We are trying really hard not to get crazy with it and many times we have found ourselves having to step back and think is this for us or for Bree. I still can't believe she is going to be one year. I still can't believe that I am a mom sometimes.